April 18, 2019, 09:42:20 PM

Author Topic: Story - Sonia Belmont's  (Read 7368 times)

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Offline rasgar

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #30 on: December 21, 2012, 07:14:18 PM »
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It would be cool if Uber Drac was defeated by everyone at the same time but in different time streams

Reminds me of Sonic 2006 - which isn't a bad thing, because I'm one of the few people in the universe that didn't hate that game (I actually enjoyed it quite a lot).

Offline Malphas

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #31 on: December 21, 2012, 09:31:56 PM »
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Quote
Like, each character defeated him alone and Aeon's power fused every defeat in a single timestream so to ensure his complete erasure.
Not only this makes uber-Dracula many times more uber, but also could work quite well. It's an interesting concept. But then Jonathan and Charlotte's stories would need to be adapted to it, as well as this one, right? I like it a lot, though.

Offline Fou-Lu

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #32 on: December 21, 2012, 09:45:29 PM »
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It's not happening though because we need and already have one coherent idea that is being used for all stories.  If this has not been made clear enough I'll make a post today clarifying it.  This was never open for debate and I'm unsure why anyone thought it was.
« Last Edit: December 21, 2012, 10:36:21 PM by Fou-Lu »

Offline ThePlotTwist

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #33 on: December 22, 2012, 12:07:04 AM »
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Fou-Lu, nobody is trying to rewrite your precious story. Stop being hot headed and read my original post; "musing". Brainstorming is good for creativity. Relax, we can read your rules and are writing by them. In fact, everyone here posting their ideas and stories are doing an awesome job. In my opinion at least.
« Last Edit: December 22, 2012, 12:27:04 AM by (yber])ragon10]{ »

Offline (yber])ragon10]{

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #34 on: December 22, 2012, 12:30:49 AM »
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Wouldn't brainstorming in a dedicated topic be more productive than, I don't know, sprinkling everything around in random threads for individual story review and critiquing? Nothing's wrong until you start derailing threads from their created purpose. :/
"So you know cats are interesting. They are kind of like girls. If they come and talk to you it's great. But if you try to talk to them it doesn't always go so well."
~ Shigeru Miyamoto

Offline Fou-Lu

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #35 on: December 22, 2012, 02:31:48 AM »
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Allow me to link you to something that already pretty much sums up my thoughts here
http://serio.piiym.net/CVBla/board/index.php?topic=299.msg3047#msg3047

This is the third time you've done this ThePlotTwist and I'd really like you to stop doing it.  If you'd like to speculate changing the main storyline do not do it in other people's topics as stated above.

I'm not saying anything bad will happen if you don't stop doing this, I'm saying your are causing confusion which isn't needed.  As such I'd like you to think about what that accomplishes.

For the record the changes you proposed would have ZERO effect on my own story.  I was merely; as Morrison does here defending Serio's own story nothing more.

« Last Edit: December 22, 2012, 02:45:20 AM by Fou-Lu »

Offline Malphas

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #36 on: January 06, 2013, 02:24:40 AM »
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Ribbit! I have changed Shaft's dialog so Al doesn't actually die.
Also, I have spoken with the person in charge of Alucard's story and after a few unwelcoming words I have come to terms with the guy.
Shaft's scene will be pre-battle in the case of Sonia and post battle (but not so long) in the case of Alucard. Whaddaya think?

Shaft now looks like a real strategist, but this could make Drac look less awesome. For now I think it doesn't look like it.
Any downsides to this new plot? If it sucks, why?

NOTE: I mostly edited Shaft conversation and Richter's post battle so everything else is pretty much the same.

Offline Morrison

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #37 on: January 09, 2013, 04:48:51 AM »
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Coming late to the party, gonna toss in my two cents.  On a tablet so bear with me.

Quote
Canon hero stopping uber drac

The reason why a canon hero was picked for Mortal Kombat was because it became successful enough to warrant a Mortal Kombat 2.  In order to continue the story, a clear winner needed to be picked.  We really don't have that problem here.  In this game, every character has an equal opportunity to stop Uber-Drac because every character has something to bring to the table...it's less about physical prowess and more about life's abstracts, like ambition and purity of purpose. 

As for explicitly killing characters, I have a serious problem with what I consider to be shock value.  Happens in comics all the time.  It's usually the last resort of writers who need to force character development or plot advancement.  Would really advise against it.

As for the main story/rules, I'm getting impatient with the prevalent attitude of "it's Serio' s game, do what I want."  Rules exist for a reason-- to keep us on track, specifically.  You' 're free to exercise your creativity but you' 're playing in someone else's sandbox.  Some things just won't change.
« Last Edit: January 09, 2013, 05:05:24 AM by Morrison »

Offline Malphas

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #38 on: January 10, 2013, 11:44:41 AM »
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I know, that's why I did all the changes last time. Now that I know what is written on stone I sure won't try to change it again (or I shouldn't, lol)
Are the changes more acceptable now? I basically removed Alucard boss and changed it for 'Shaft reloaded' boss. It should have a good effect in the story without having to fight-kill Alucard. If this part is ok now I will also edit Death and Drac so they fit the new story.

Offline Malphas

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #39 on: January 15, 2013, 02:03:41 AM »
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I separated the different bosses into many parts so it can be reviewed more easily. Shaft and the ending on the cliff are the things that have changed now (and also Richter, so it fits more with the doppelgänger-thing)
Would this story be ok now? Can I continue with Death and Drac?

Offline Malphas

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #40 on: January 27, 2013, 02:32:27 AM »
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Ok so the story should be 100% finished by now. Any major/not so major flaws to report?
I think I made Dracula sound like a total jerk, but he has been THE boss for a long time so he may behave like that.

NOTE: even though she tries, Sonia Doesn't seal Dracula's power. She destroys him and Aeon erases his era and cleans the mess.
NOTE 2: Dracula says that everyone else is most likely dead... but most likely does not mean that he actually knows it, he just wants to demoralize whoever is in front of him.

Can this version be finally accepted? If I still need to modify anything I have plenty of time right now.
Also, the Alucard story will be posted soon and will have the pre battle conversation with Shaft  as a post battle instead, can I do this?

Offline rasgar

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #41 on: February 06, 2013, 02:40:09 PM »
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I just read through most of this, and I like it. I didn't really notice any glaring logical errors or anything like that.

Having the encounter with an Alucard who doesn't recognize her adds some nice tension to her story.

Offline Lilfut

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #42 on: February 12, 2013, 03:01:16 AM »
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Okay, let's get this out of the way first: I hate Sonia. I think she's a generic character that people only like due to being female and hated by Iga.

That said: I do have a soft spot for alternate-universe philosophy, and the tension with Alucard pulls it off really well. Add in well-written "generic Belmont" dialogue, and I can almost forget how much I hate the character. Good work.

Offline Lukmendes

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #43 on: May 17, 2016, 12:06:06 AM »
+1
A bit late to review this story, but oh well:

Sonia: What?! It can't be...! But then, if this is another world... Alucard...
Could he be alive too?

A bit odd for her to say that, since Alucard didn't die in her universe, she could instead wonder if he was around.

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[Sonia vs Dario]
Dario: Whaddaya mean minion?! I'll show you the awesome powers my Master has given me!! (in a way it sounds kinda stupid, but Dario was never too smart to begin with, I think it fits him)

Really weird for Dario to call Dracula "Master", he really doesn't look like the type who'd do so.

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[Sonia vs Olrox]
Sonia: I'm Sonia Bel... Sonia. This place seems different than the other areas. Olrox, are you the Lord of this place?

Why did Sonia decide to not say her full name to Olrox? She had no problem to say it to Dario.

Also, besides Olrox's personality needing changes to better suit the post DoS book he shows up, the Crimson stone refference is random and nonsensival, since Dracula already has it, besides, it's a forgotten concept, the "real deal" of Dracula's power in any other game is either his own soul or Chaos (It's one of the things that make him be the Dark Lord at least), so much so that the book which Olrox shows up, he's trying to control Chaos, not trying to find the Crimson Stone (And the writter looks like he's aware of Loi, since he makes Orlok mention that Dracula was human before).

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[Sonia vs Shaft]    NEEDS APPROVAL
Shaft: You don't seem to understand. I shall enlighten you then: The power of chaos that fuels my Master is now protecting his servants as well!
Alucard: It can not be!
Shaft: Dracula's followers are now part of this castle's energy and can not perish until Dracula's own end. Now, you will confront me until you are too weak to resist your own impulses. I can feel it already; you will soon surrender your soul to the darkness inside you.

That just feels like a random excuse made specificaly for Alucard to have lost, since this isn't mentioned with any other boss, or even in Alucard's story when he meets Shaft.

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Shaft: Not only about you, I have been following the movements of all the hunters who have been brought here... and preparing for all of you. I was told that your worst fear is to face this dhampir... and so I made it possible. But proceed, go ahead and speak to him. I only have to wait until his dark rebirth!

And how would Shaft know about that? Sonia never said that out loud.

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Shaft: I now see. I should have imagined that he could have survived in other worlds! How could I have been so blind! This dhampir is my Master's son!!

Same issue as the other story, Shaft is the same one you face in SotN.

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Sonia vs Richter] NEEDS APPROVAL
Richter: After I defeated Dracula in my world I realised how empty my life would become after Dracula's death. My power was feared and my presence... tolerated. So many years I longed for just another chance to go back in time and wait for Dracula to recover his full strength. That is my only true role. As for my... people, I owe them nothing.

His power being feared is unlikely, sure, history could be repeating itself (As in, same thing Trevor went through, Richter could be going through), but Richter rescued the villagers in RoB, which would at least make him be more respected.

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Sonia: Your thirst for battle and your selfishness caused your death, and yet I can only pity you, Richter Belmont.
-Richter vanishes-
Sonia: Uh? A doppelg�nger! I should have guessed it. Nobody with such dark intentions would ever wield this whip.

Richter is supposed to be the real deal.

Quote
[Sonia vs Death]  NEEDS APPROVAL
Death: A Belmont! Your souls have always had this similar and noble glow! It has been a long time since one of your clan made it so far.
Sonia: God of Death, I know you are well aware of who I am by now.
Death: Ha ha ha ha! No tricks, right? Tell me, are you so determined to fight that you will confront Death itself? I am much more powerful here than last time we met. You should know your own limitations as a mortal; only my Master can truly surpass me in power!

I don't see why Death would pretend to not know Sonia, much less how Sonia would know that he was lying lol.

[Sonia vs Dracula] NEEDS APPROVAL
Dracula: Impressive. I knew there was a mighty warrior who was confronting us. But I would've never thought it would be a girl... a beautiful young girl.[/quote]

Hello, I'm Chris Hansen from NBC dateline, I see you are already having a seat.

If Dracula talking with Shanoa is any hint, Dracula would still call an adult female "woman", Uber Dracula even uses one of the quotes where he says that ("You danced well woman").

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Sonia: No... not this time, fiend! With the servants I have destroyed, the vampire killer now has enough power to seal your soul for all eternity!!

The vampire killer doesn't have soul absorving powers though, or any similar power that would make it stronger by killing anyone.

Also, one thing I noticed about Alucard's story (Will post here, otherwise the post in there would merge), is that the orb in Olrox's room can't be there, the way the arcade mode is made is that the bosses are fought in random order when you reach a specific tier, and Olrox is on the same tier as Shaft, so there's a chance you'll fight Shaft before Olrox.

Anyway, story was pretty good for the most part.

Those stories are making me realize one thing though, looks like nobody likes St. Germain lol.

Offline Malphas

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Re: Story - Sonia Belmont's
« Reply #44 on: May 18, 2016, 03:19:48 AM »
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This one looks like it has far more mistakes than Al's, even though Cyber already changed quite a few things. I'll eventually get it to work.


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Why did Sonia decide to not say her full name to Olrox? She had no problem to say it to Dario.
Dario went kind of crazy when he heard "Belmont" so she decided to keep quiet about it.

Quote
Those stories are making me realize one thing though, looks like nobody likes St. Germain lol.

Germain was always my first choice since I didn't know much about Aeon, but I changed it here and there until eventually only the Master Skeleton story has Germain around. It makes sense that Grant's story also has Germain, since he's around during curse of Darkness and all. Maybe I'll make him come back.

And again, much appreciated!
« Last Edit: May 18, 2016, 10:46:30 AM by Malphas »

 

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